REVIEW: Grace-Based Parenting (Tim Kimmel)
January 8, 2011
This book really got me thinking. Actually, it changed a lot about the way I think as a parent. I kept reading this booking waiting for the chapter(s) where it would give me tried and true “techniques” that I could use on my nearly 4-year-old. They never appeared. Simply put, grace-based parenting isn’t a technique, it’s a lifestyle.
What is grace?
- Grace is receiving something we don’t deserve but desperately need.
What do kids need? LOVE, PURPOSE & HOPE
- A love that is secure.
- A purpose that is significant.
- A hope that is strong.
How do we give them those things? FREEDOM
- Freedom to be different.
- Freedom to be vulnerable.
- Freedom to be candid.
- Freedom to make mistakes.
Basically this book shared with me something that I’ve known for a long time but could never really wrap my head around it. I still may not do a good job of trying to put this into words because it is such an abstract concept. I should parent my child the way the Lord parents me, with grace. I have to look at each situation and determine if it causing issues spiritually because, ultimately, nothing else matters.
This is one of those books where I think the concepts will be of great use to me when my child is older, especially in the pre-teen to teenage years. Half-way through I considered putting it down and waiting until that time to finish it. However, I constantly feel like I am on the reactive end of parenting. This book at least gave me valuable knowledge that I can put into practice right now! I love being proactive. 🙂
Basically, here is what I know. Children are emotionally-fragile little creatures. Everything we do or don’t do adds up. I am going to let my child down in one way or another because I’m not perfect but I only want the best for her.
Here is what I learned. There is no parenting book like the Bible but it is passed-down parenting. I grow in my relationship with my heavenly Father and it spills over into the parenting of my own child. I show her grace that she doesn’t deserve but desperately needs. Just like me. It’s like the trickle-down effect.
After reading this book, I still feel inadequate as a mom. Parenting is such a HUGE responsibility and I take it very seriously. I want my child to experience a love that is secure, determine a purpose that is significant, and develop a hope that is strong. That’s a tall order for us as parents. The flip side is that the Lord trusted me to raise this little girl (how awesome is that?) but ultimately He has control. I just pray I can surrender my control (and my child) to Him.
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