The Last Milestones

When our kiddos are babies we yearn for them to cross milestone after milestone. We eagerly anticipate them and document them with Facebook posts for all the world to see. We want everyone to know when our sweet babe rolls over, gets their first tooth, has their first bite of (fill in the blank), sleeps through the night, crawls, walks, says their first word, gets their first hair cut, looses a first tooth and the list goes on. All the way up to the first day of Kindergarten. All of the firsts… us mamas eat them up.

The flip side is that there are some lasts as well. We don’t often think about those things. Sometimes we never even realize when the last has happened. It just kind of does. And once we’ve realized they aren’t doing that same thing anymore, it’s hard to go back and pinpoint the date. These things just happen gradually over time.

I don’t remember the last time my child nursed but I know it was somewhere around 20-22 months. It just happened gradually as she became more and more busy. Over time, she awoke and preferred to greet the world with gusto rather than snuggling in bed with me.

I don’t remember the last time I picked up my child and put her on my hip. She got so heavy and long & lanky so quick. Maybe it was around age 6 but now I’m scratching my head wondering if I maybe it was only age 5. Again, as she grew, it gradually just became more cumbersome to pick her up. If she needed consoling, I would sit and drag her over to my lap instead. But I can’t remember the last time I picked her up and carried her. When she was small it seemed as though I toted her everywhere. I vaguely thought to myself “I wonder when she will be too big to carry” and, just as quickly, it left my mind because I couldn’t really fathom such a day. But, O, how quickly that day came and now I can’t even remember when it was. Dang it!

I don’t remember the last time tLG mispronounced words. My little one had quite the vocabulary from an early start and she hardly ever mispronounced words. In fact, I can only think of a few. I never corrected these words because they were so stinking cute and just so rare for her.

• Eastus = Easton (our dog)
• Moont = Moon
• Peapock = Peacock
• Four Liter = 4-wheeler

And then one day she just wasn’t saying them any more and I was kinda sad about it because I couldn’t remember the last time she used each one.

Now that I know such ending milestones can occur, I’m desperately grasping to know what will come next and when our last __(fill in the blank)__ will be.

Lately, I’ve been mentally documenting every time we hold hands in public. We started this practice of holding hands in the parking lot early on, as a safety precaution, of course. At age 7, she’s clearly old enough to behave in the parking lot so I’ve stopped reaching out for her hand. Surprisingly enough, she still reaches for mine. Not every time but enough that I still notice only because it makes my heart get all full and tingly when that sweet little hand slides into mine. Yet, I wonder “Will today be the last time?”

Earlier this week we went to Target. I was fumbling with keys or who knows what as I was getting out of the car. When I looked up, that little arm was reached out waiting for for me to take hold of her hand. I happily grabbed it and silently wondered again, “Is this the last time?”

The sweet baby things fade away when we least expect it. I don’t want to loose any more last milestones. I don’t necessarily want to mourn over them. I simply want to document the moments. All too often we look back at raising children and it’s just a blur. We don’t mean for it to be. In fact, we think that we won’t ever forget. As a parent on the other side of so many firsts, I can assure you, it goes by faster and blurrier than you might imagine. The mundane day-to-day activities of feeding, clothing, cleaning, and transporting a kid steal the sweet moments that I want to document. So, I’m putting my foot down. But, I need your help.

Parents of older children, guide me here. What last milestones are ahead of me that I haven’t even thought of yet? Help me anticipate them so that I can document and enjoy them now while they are still happening.